Tab TV: The Nissan Edition

I treasure my friends, for I can say that I know many people (but most of the time not thier names, cos I'm a forgetful bastard), but the few friends I have are very good friends indeed.

You know who you are, whether I go out with you every week, or I have not returned your headphones in months, or even those that don't even read this thing, I treasure our friendship.

Isyraf is right. We are growing old. Among Sing, Vishnu and Isyraf, I'm the oldest among all of them, and to put it simply, i have not many accomplishments to be proud of.

Which brings me to the fact that I have to improve myself. How? I'm working on it.

Anyways, congruent with my sad and lonely life, I finished Halo 3 in 9 hours. Master chief died in the end. Fuck. They just killed off a multi-million dollar franchise and any chance of making a movie.

Ah well. Anyways, back to the topic of unit trusts. My sister apparently, was too busy to come over this week, so she still hasn't given me my moolah to start investing. I have my eyes set on a few trusts I'm willing to put my money on, but as of now, I still don't have full privy to all the unit trusts sold in Singapore. Because in Singapore, to start investing, you need to be 21. So my sister needs to set up a beneficiary account. And she's taking awfully long to set it up. I need the account so I can use my weekdays to go fundpping.

On a side note, all the backalleys at geylang are so cool to drive around at night. We were looking for some tab tv material, but alas we only spotted a few traders plying their trade. Its ok, that's what a CD guy is for. I'll just ask my friends this week where all the trade shows are, and we can get some good reality tv next week. Hoho.

ZulDonald Gates

Yesterday we all had a ball of a time. Vishnu, Sing and Isyraf came over to my house to watch a movie.

At first, we all were out already. Isyraf fetched me from my house, we proceeded on to fetch Sing, then Vishnu. Then we realised that Vishnu didn’t book the tickets.

Isyraf was cheering. Why? He didn’t want to pay $9.50 to watch Premonition.

Neither did I. I would watch if everyone wanted to. So I suggested that since I had a lot of movies at home, we all could watch it over at my place.

And boy, was I dressed to go home. So was Sing. All of us dressed in our Sunday best to go to my house. Whee.

So I connected my laptop to my tv. And mofo bloody hell, its clearer to do stuff on my tv than on the laptop. Further proof that plasma beats LCD.

And no one was happier to see 42 inches of pleasure than Sing. He couldn’t stop looking into my private files and folders.

Folders of pics we took back in MJ lah, you perv! I don’t have any ‘alternative’ stuff on my com.

We watched my movie, ate ice-cream, drank coke, and watched Son Of the Beach. I don’t know why no one found it smart and witty. Only Sing laughed a bit la, but Vishnu and isyraf were somewhat bored.

Then we went surfing around in friendster and facebook. I haven’t logged on my friendster account for so long that when other people view me, the “logged on since” function doesn’t show the last time I logged on.

Come to think of it, I can’t remember when was the last time I logged on. And that account is like only 4 months old. That’s quite bad. Haha

Had dinner today with my family. Ate 2 slices of pizzas, 7 sweet and spicy drumlets and lots of briyani. Hoho. Getting fatter and fatter aren’t we. I haven’t jogged in 4 months, and I tired doing so last week. Couldn’t finish quarter of a round around my estate. Tried again 2 days ago, I pushed myself, finished a round 3 mins off my timing 4 months ago, but I had to stop myself from doing another. Why?

Cos of a searing pain across my chest. Haha. I’m too young to die. But before you start preparing to auction away my things in preparation of my demise, rest assured, I’m still relatively healthy ok. It was just a cramp, caused by heavy breathing due to a lack of exercise, so my chest was overtaxed. Thanks wikipedia.

Anyways, I told my sister that the money books she loaned me were very useful and I asked her for more. She said she’ll try to find some more for me..

And she’ll be sponsoring my first 1k in a unit trust of my choice underneath my name. Woohoo!
Now, nothing’s set in stone yet, but all I know is that that 1k will help me learn about the process of investing cash.

I just hope that I can wear her down to actually give me that 1k. haha. She wasn’t explicit enough as to say whether it’s a loan or a free cash starter.

And in the spirit of charity, my mother has allowed me full usage of the small university cash present for me to invest. Its been sitting in an Islamic bank account under my name. It was supposed to be a present for me to buy my clothes, laptop, and phone, for the hard work (yeah right) I put in to go to uni.

So I managed to convince her that letting that money rot in a bank account was not as beneficial as giving it to me to invest it now, while I’m still free in NS and not needing the money yet.

On a side note, the Islamic banking account from OCBC has generated 1.64% DIVIDENDS p.a on my uni present. That is quite a high rate ah. Plus the fact that its not interest, its counted as halal derived money, therefore it can be used for food. I guess I can use some of my dividends to buy a bigger pair of pants.

So I guess now, its off for a learing journey. How am I to invest my uni present and my sister’s starter fund without losing it all?

I guess this is where SCDF has its benefits aye? I have time to research. And given that I’m in the finance department, where everybody from the directors to the clerical civilians invest their cash, there’s bound to be someone who can guide my hand.

Cos my sister is too busy, she’s just dumping the cash in my hands and expecting me to make a miracle.

Hullo? All I know now is to put that cash in my NTUC savings account. I’m no risk taker, especially when its my own money at stake. I guess that’s why, I’ll never be a ZulDonald Gates.

Swim, my little princess! Swim like the mermaid from pocahontas!

Prodigious Accumulators of Wealth (PAW) : These are people who are disciplined enough to live below their means, and use their surplus money to invest and increase their net worth.

These people need not necessarily have high incomes. They can have a range of incomes, but their net worth is much higher than most other people in their income group.

Current Net Worth > Expected Net Worth

Under Accumulators of Wealth (UAW) : These are people who are not disciplined enough to live below their means. They may live from paycheck to paycheck or they may live above their means, sustaining their spending habits via credit and loans.

Current Net Worth < Expected Net Worth


How do you calculate expected net worth?

Multiply your age times your realized pretax annual household income from all sources except inheritances.
Divide by ten.
This, excluding any inherited wealth, is what your net worth is expected to be.

So for example, my NS pay is say $470. My age is 19.
Therefore: 470 X 19 = 8930
8930 / 10 = 893

My current expected net worth is $893. If you take away the cash I’ve saved up and I’ve been given from young, minus my earned tuition cash, my current net worth (cash earned from NS only) is much less than $893.

So I’m a UAW. Damn.

I did this test with my friend at HQ. He too went to JC, so he faces the same spending pressures. His expected net worth is the same, but his current net worth (likewise, only considering cash that he only saved and earned in NS only) is double of mine. The fact that he has served 3 months more NS still doesn’t make it an excuse for me to have less than half his net worth.

I spend too much.

So I decided to take some measures. As said earlier, to make things easier on oneself, make things automatic. My monthly savings account deducts a certain amount from my NS pay and transfers it to a high interest fixed deposit.

But what about the excess cash that I (hopefully) manage to save? It does not generate much interest. The normal 0.25% p.a. interest on your savings account is below Singapore’s inflation rate. (2% GST increase on everything you buy? and a further hike to 10% GST in the next few years?)
So basically not only do I spend a lot, but money that I’m saving and keeping in the bank is losing its value just by sitting there.

Life sucks eh?

Not exactly. If you look around, you can actually save and make your money grow, or at least sustain itself. My monthly savings account will eventually provide me with the capital to invest when it matures in 2 years time, when I actually know how to at least not lose my money by making the wrong choices.

So what about the depreciating money in the bank?
I suggest 2 options. Put it into a fixed deposit account to generate interest that will at least cover part of the loss due to inflation.

POSB provides the best services for our age group: Minimum $1000 deposit. Period of 1-12 mths available. So basically you can select a 1 mth tenure, and when it matures, your money will lock itself for another month, unless you call the bank to do otherwise.

OCBC provides a little higher interest, though minimum cash required is $5000. Tenure policies are similar.

Interest rates for both is about 0.375%

* Go check the rates yourself first, before doing anything, don’t blame me if anything is wrong you lazy shit.

Another option is to have a high interest savings account. That’s what I’m doing, (as I want to have the freedom to use my cash anytime anywhere and not lock in a fixed deposit)

And guess what? I found a damn good alternative. The Fairprice savings account. Its like a normal savings account from OCBC, BUT it has neither minimum deposit nor minimum amount needed in the account.

Plus its interest rate is 1%.

Its bloody higher than an f.d. plus it offers you the fluidity of nets. And you get linkpoints if you use the card at NTUC.

Cool. But I hope they approve my application for it though, I think I have too many accounts in OCBC. ( And all of them have no money.) haha.

I guess being a clerk in CD ain’t so bad eh? Who has the time to read up on all this shit at commando camp?

Speaking of work, my officer is going for his honeymoon. And now I’m in charge of his stuff. All the submissions for performance indicators, stats on payments and lots more of other stuff. I’m flattered that he trusts me, but hey! I’m only an NSF. I don’t understand all your stats calculations and all your numbers. I’m not in NTU yet! Aiyoh.

But he did speak to the director about my promotion predicament, and I’m “slated” for promotion in November. At least that’s what I read in the minutes of one of his meetings.

I should not have been penalised for my meningitis la. For goodness sake, you ask me to do all your thinking shit, you call me your asset, you promise me SGT if I pass my IPPT ( you might as well promise me a million bucks cos IPPT is like learning how to fly) but you don’t try to keep your asset happy. If this were the private sector, I would have left already.

Cannot tahan. I really feel like a stupid mat now. Given work I barely understand how to do and I still have to do it. Thank god I’m friends with one of the civilians who can help with all the calculations.

Maybe I should show him my MJ report card. (I never got above E for maths in 2 years of JC, except for the giveaway promos, where people got 98/100 and I barely passed. Hoho.)

How I managed to do the A levels is beyond my small mat brain.

Anyways, enough talk about money and stupid CD stuff.

I SAW MY STUDENTS SWIMMING TODAY! Hoho.

As I was walking home, I heard screams of help. Being the heroic CD clerk, who barely knows how to do CPR cos I forgot ready, I went to peek over at the pool. I saw 2 ang moh girls spraying each other with a water gun. Then I realised it was 2 of my students. So, being the concerned tutor, I went over to ask whether the small kid finished her homework. Lo and behold, she didn’t.

But now I know why she’s so tired for tuition, and why a P5 girl has tan lines all over her body. Not that I look, ok?!?!

Aiyoh she’s not the studying kind la. She wants to be an actress. I think she has talent. You should see her eyes water when I scold her during tuition.

As for her older sister, kudos to your smart ass, man. She’s the one who’s going to ensure that I retain my job next year. She scoring 80++ for her subjects.

Woohoo. Spell “iron rice bowl” anyone?

Prodigious Accumulators of Wealth

Have you read the report about the NS guy who ran away with his rifle?

I know I'm just a CD mat, but let me give you my 2 cents' worth first.

"For serious security incidents such as those involving missing arms and ammunition, the unit’s Duty Operations Officer is required to report the incident to the Army’s General Staff Operations Centre within 30 minutes.
However, in this case, Corporal Teo, together with his firearm and ammunition, was discovered missing by the Guard Commander at 11.59pm on 2 September, but the Army’s General Staff Operations Centre was only informed of this incident at 3am the next day.
The Military Police were alerted at 3.30am and when their preliminary investigations showed that the missing firearm and ammunition were no longer on the camp premises, the Police were contacted at 5.45am."

"Guards on patrol duties are also required to make situational reporting to the guard room at half—hour intervals but these were not enforced properly or Corporal Teo’s absence would have been detected earlier."

Ok, let me say something first. NO ONE reports every half hour la. At least not in CD. And if certain friends of mine can sleep while on guard in the army, that means CD is not the only one 'relaxing in a korner'.

And like come on, if you were to really report lost guns within 30 mins of discovering someone missing, then there'll be a manhunt for every guy who failed to report cos he needed to take a shit.

But then again, this was not CD. Unlike us, the Army doesn't take 5 months to process everything.

Anyways, I got my portable DVD player. Its 5 months late. And it sucks. There are like smaller and better portable media players for $165, which is what they spent on each mat. (plus the one they gave is this cheapo china made one, that even the storemen themselves said will last for about 2 months)

I'd rather they give me a $150 cash voucher like what they got last year for CD day.

But then agian, its free. So thank you CD. Money well spent.


So today, I did forces for tutition with my P5 kid. Hot stuff man. Forces requires you to demonstrate push and pull, so I got to poke her, to illustrate that a beating someone is a push motion.

I got to pinch her, to illustrate that living things respond to external stimuli.

You get the picture. haha.

But yes, I really like my student. She's so cute la. Plus, she requires 5-6 sessions of tuition a week. Definitely her best quality, for both me and my wallet. Heh.

On another note, you know how I was so hyped up about reading all those investment books my sister loaned me? Well, they suck. They teach you how to be Prodigious Accumulators of Wealth (PAW), and how not to be Underaccumulators (UAW).

After reading though the first book, I've signed up for the OCBC monthly savings account, to become less of a mat and actually save part of my meager earnings.

But, the next step is to invest, and I'm on my way to being a millionaire. (Bear in mind you have to be frugal, which is not in my vocabulary). Anyways, the books wrote that if you start saving $100/mth when you're 19, by the time you're 59, you'll get $1,122,242.

Cool right? But WAIT!

That is if you earn compund interest of freaking 12%. Tell me what bank on earth pays compound interest of 12%? The thing i signed up for has a promo rate of 1.68% FIXED interest.

But if you do read the invest section in the Sunday Times, you see that most people they interviewed have returns of 20% on their investments.

Cool right? But WAIT!

They're freaking CFOs, stock brokers, fund managers.

They're not CD mats. So I guess there's one thing left to do.

Open up my account at Vishnu International Bank. Hoho.

The Latte Factor

My sister has been giving me books on how to plan for my financial future. I now know that the tidy sum she has invested in several funds and her own personal cash is due to astute financial planning on her part, none of which is due to magic or her huge salary (which she should share with her brother).

What I learnt so far:

• The latte factor. All the small unnecessary stuff that you buy on a daily basis, eg. Lattes which you can bring from home instead of buying from starbucks, can cost you thousands a year, money which in turn could have generated more cash.
  
• Save what you can. Millionaires don’t go buying those nice JBL speakers. Entry level Creative speakers will do.
  
• They NEVER borrow money from banks, but in my case my bank is the Vishnu International ( Interest free wad ).
  
• They always have what unused money they have making more money in several trust, index, hedge or other kind of funds.
  
• Most ( not all ) start young. And the sooner you start, the higher the chance of getting your first million before your retirement.
  
• The more money you have, your gains will proportionately be bigger.
  
• For the undisciplined like moi, you have to make it automatic, i.e. you have to invest the money as soon as you get it. You also can’t spend what you don’t see, if a proportion of your pay is channelled straight into a separate account for investment/savings purposes.

So after a short look at the several funds offered by our local banks, I realised that the thousands I’ve wasted on stupid stuff (latte factor) has cost me even more money.

Why? Cos I don’t have the minimum amount to start a fund.

Anyways, for those of you out there who like me, can’t save a single cent, my advice is, start slow.

I’m going to sign up for the auto-savings account thing for my bank account, where they deduct a certain preset amount from you, and transfer it to a higher interest account. The best thing is, there’s no penalty or extra charges. So the bank gets you to save, plus they give you about 1.3% interest, much higher than the current 0.25% your savings account fetches.

Using this method, you could set aside maybe $100 monthly. By the time you ORD and enter uni, you can shift your cash to a index fund, or buy that nice laptop you’ve been eyeing.

Best thing is, this method is automated, so like I said, you can’t spend what you can’t see. Definitely for people without discipline like me.

I sound like a damn salesman. Damn. But I guess, if I’m ever going to buy my silver Audi TT Quattro before the age of 35, I’ve got to start planning early.


‘Why so serious about your future now?’ You may ask me. Well, when Vishnu, Sing and I were in Isyraf’s car last week, I realised something.
WE ARE OLD!

We’re old enough to drive. Old enough to die in a red rhino crash at a traffic junction. Old enough to start worrying how in the hell we’re going to provide for ourselves.

Got to start saving. Got to stop spending. And I’ve got to terminate my credit card with Vishnu International. Haha.

The Tipping Point: Rise of the Lipids

Wah. I didnt know that I could be such a violent person. What I did was so not me. It was so primal. I think I may be turning from fat boy to fat man. Hoho.

There's this ACJC failure in my office. He acts gay 24/7. Smacks everyone's ass, hugs and puts his dandruff laden head on you. Now that's not so bad right? Try having him around 5 days a week, for 5 months. Good god. Everyone is about to snap. We used to reason with him, but now we have to resort to physical means like simply pushing him away.

But yesterday, he pissed me off to the max. I just woke up from my lunch nap, and had a deadline to meet. He was putting his disgusting head on my shoulder and hugging me, and caressing my butt. I pushed him away, but after doing so for like 5 times, I said sternly, "Fuck off, or I'll smack your face you moronic piece of shit."

A normal human would have just stopped fooling around and realise that ppl needed to get some work done. But he's an idiot. So when he started grabbing my face, and in doing so, bending my specs which cost more than his life, I snapped.

Literally. I grabbed him by his collar, threw him on my desk, and pinned him against the cubicle wall. "Idiot! Even a dog knows when to fuck off. You a person or dog?" He looked at me, with the stubborness of a 3 year old child. I threw him across the table, and he slid off the table and fell onto the floor.

Woohoo. Funny as hell. I could have gotten a few days detention if anyone saw that. Thank god no one did.

BUT!

An hour later, he came back, again, head on my shoulder, but this time, he was massaging my neck. He then squeezed my artery. Whoa. That was the tipping point.

He was behind me, while i was sitting on my chair. So i elbowed his chest and got up. I twisted his arm, the way teck teng showed me how the police do it, and i started to crush his right wrist. By now he was helpless.

Heh.

"ok.OK. I stop. Stop crushing me."

So i let go off him and he continued doing my work. For 20 mins, he was standing behind me, staring at me. My civilian officer said maybe I caused him to become insane. Haha. He said I was too harsh.

But when someone says stop fooling around so many times and you don't stop, the person will snap. And I snapped. And I didn't see any of the civilian officers stop the fight. All the adjacent cubicles were occupied by them, and they kept quiet. Obviously, someone needed to smack him, but no one wanted to touch him, probably cos of his dandruff.

Anyways, I was thinking, as I always do, on how to cover my ass, just in case I get accused of bullying. First thing this morning, I told my officer the whole thing, including me pinning him down. I reiterated the fact that I reasoned with him first, and that I am not a physical person. I also told him that I do not want to be seen as an antagonist. I was antagonised instead.

And I told him the rest of the story, no spinning, no bullshiting. The whole truth, because I notice he has a knack for finding out the truth.

And it got sorted out in role call today that took like half an hour of my lunch.

Now that idiot touches me with a pen or pencil, and talks to me nicely.

Cool. I've learnt one thing today. That is reasoning with a moron alone doesn't work. You must smack it into him. But of course, ensure that any action taken is retaliatory, not pre-emptive. So you're never in the wrong.

I hope this story inspires all other people who get irritated till they can't take it. Smack at the right time, make sure its a validated smacking and be irritant free for the rest of your NS life.

** Note, I'm not exaggerating any of the throwing around parts. He's a small thin gay guy, who despite weighing lighter than a sack of rice, can't do a pull up. So even my pri 5 student can throw him around. (So ya la. I'm not that macho.) (And yes, my student would rather throw me around.)

Hoho. I never change.

The Hills have eyes

Little do I know.. There are eyes watching. Everyday, after tutition, a pair of eyes stare at me, stalking my every movement from block 89 to 86.

Every day, the eyes watch, the mind stirs, but she doesn't want to succumb to my hotness.


WTF is this weirdo pervert talking about, you ask? Well, after some casual banter with one of my students about the cute pussies on the first floor, (2 Siamese cats) I discovered that my other student has been looking out the window every night to see me walk from her block to mine.

Ah, young infatuation and crushes. I can't blame her of course. I can add this to the innumerable and irreputable incidents which once again concretise my reputation as being damn bloody good looking.

Not only have I enthralled females the world over with my good looks, (Ms Universe called me again this morning), but I've now even captivated kids half our age. HAHA. I guess age is no barrier for the reach of my good looks.

Of course she likes you, she looks like a dolt right?

HAH! No! She's young, but hot. She's got her looks from her ang moh dad.

But too bad she's my "client" and therefore I must be professional and stuff, lest I lose my porcelain rice bowl.

Plus I think that the hot minah girls on the first floor ( the 2 Siamese cats' owners ) are hotter. They live right next to the pool, and their windows and curtains are always open. A bit exhibitionist to me, but after a bit of observation to and from tuition, they're JC ppl.

Hmm, hot minahs who have some smarts, living in the next block.

Wowee, I'm just a mat, but even I can do the odds on that and the odds are freaking impossible.

Tuition has brought nothing but benefits for me.

I've got more money now, and among the SIVZ gang, I'm the highest earner. (though I still have to sometimes borrow money from Vishnu, to make ends meet until my pay comes, but I'm working on that. My sis gave me a book on how to manage my money. But its impossible to get my mat brain to work. I can't seem to read engrish. And mats by nature borrow money, so I'm sorry.) But for some reason, I'm still the poorest.

Vishnu has a freaking 32 inch sony HDTV in his room.

How do I know this? Isyraf drove us in his own car to Vishnu's house.

Siu Sing is going OCS, a mere stepping stone to becoming a future engineering visonary.

And the mat is still poor and stupid. Hmph.

Tuition has also allowed me to explore the next block's nice cats, 2 purebred siamese, 2 tabbies and 2 purebred homosapien hotties of the minah-hottiecocus species. Haha.

Anyways, my sister just came back from Japan. (Nothing like talking about family to stop my imagination from running wild)

She says that japan rocks. Ok, enough about Japan.

I'm bored. I'm going to watch lost now.

We are CD.. We are CD... To be the best that we can be..

Met Soo Yee just now on the way home. She looks nicer than the last time I saw her, which was like 9 months ago after the last A level paper I think.

How time flies. And how people change for the better. And guess what?

She's taking BUSINESS!!!! Shit man. Is everybody taking business now? Be it at some private uni, SIM or Changkat Changi 3-for-$10 uni, everyone is taking damn business.

I'm beginning to think that if i take Urdu literature and flunk it, my job prospects will be be higher than if i graduate with 1st class honours from NTU. Cos every Tom, Dick, Harry, Jane, Chan, Ahmad and Velu is taking business. And countless others are thinking of taking business.

Damn. Maybe I'll reapply next year for a PE degree, get a useless Masters and grow up to become a Mr Aidil from MJ.

Then I met John from Vishnu's class. We started talking about how crummy NS is. He's a clerk too, so we clicked instantly. Anyways, he was going on about how CD is becoming more and more prominent in the news and its role in society. At first, I thought he wanted to borrow money from me or sth, haha. But after a while, I realised he actually did think CD was useful.

LOL.

I must concede that yes, what he's saying is true. We do daily stuff that benefits society, we do prepare people for disasters, and we are one of the best in Asia, and we train more countries fire services instead of us training in other places, like in the crummy army.

Its all true. From the outside, CD may seem fine.

But to put it in the wise words of this NJC flunker who made more money after his A levels than I made in my lifetime, and who also just wrote a letter to Min_ef asking why he dint get posted to the army, he says " Its not that I want to enter the army because of the prestige, its the disgrace of being in _D that pisses me off."

*Fill in the blanks yourself. Gaaarmen watching. Haha.

At least one person respects the work CD does. Haha.

The Poseidon Adventure

I watched Poseidon yesterday.

Man. What a lousy movie. The way they escaped from the ship was as realistic as me going running on my own cos I'm worried about my health. They tried to balance the impossibility of the escape by killing off the hot latino girl and my hot Kurt Russel, who happened to be a fireman turned New-York mayor. My kind of guy.

It was a waste of my time. I think I should stop rationing my lost and heroes episodes and just watch them.

Toodles.

Baris! Hormat ke hadapan, HOR-MAT!

Hey. You see, according to the manpower distribution in the building, I'm an extra guy in my department, most probably a 'special order' clerk because of my qualifications, or maybe because I'm a rare find, seeing as I have a brain and all.

Anyways, more to this later.

So I'm in charge of accompanying my finance audit team to the respective places where we audit and help them out.

On Tuesday, I sat in the front seat of my colleague's car cos my officer went to the place by himself.

Now here I am, in uniform, in the front seat of the car, the provost stops the car, checks it, and allows us in.

Suddenly, from the guardroom, came out the division RSM. He looked at me, then saluted me.

LOL. I was like "um.. ok." He realised his mistake and started shouting for me and my colleague to wear our passes.

I know I look like an officer la. A Captain, nonetheless, but I'm not a captain yet. No need to salute la.

Then, during the audit, this division had just set up a mess. So they were super nervous about the audit. I had like 3 SSGs waiting and looking at me, ready to answer or grab any file I need at any time.

Ah, this makes me feel like I'm of use again.

But what I really can't understand is why people are scared shitless about audits. No corruption, no problem what.

And I tell you ah, garmen rules and regulations are a waste of time. The amount of paperwork to do something is rainforest-killing. Chop here, print this, chop that, print 2 copies in case the building burns down, send one copy to another department so they can file it and dispose of it 10 years later. Wah. Useless.

This post is rather pointless, I know. Anyways, I was thinking of buying a nitro-powered R/C car. It'll be fun, modifying the engine, painting a body.. The idea expanded into a buying a nitro helicopter. Fun, fun. It'll cost a bomb, but I can afford it la, all this tuition I'm having, all of it can't be spent on food, cos I'm running out of food to buy.

Then I pictured myself playing the thing. All alone, near the empty field near the bbq pits. What a sad sight. Then I realised that me wanting all this stupid stuff is cos I have more time than I can shake a stick at, like what someone said to me.

So here I am now, without an R/C vehicle, typing nonsense on a Saturday afternoon, cos I'm bored, but can't go out cos I have to see my sister off at night.

I need a bigger stick to shake.

And no, I'm not referring to that kind of stick to shake, you freaking dirty shit.